Thanks to Katherine Simons

Date: Mon, 10 Jan 2000 17:11:59 -0500
To: greg@onet.net
From: Tom Dygard

hey!

A woman I am in touch with in MN has been working on her bathroom, doing
retiling and stuff, and just emailed yesterday to tell me she had to buy a
whole new toilet (there was other stuff in the letter, too) and was bummed
that it was too old to permit parts replacement. I thought you would enjoy
what I wrote for her this morning...



I was so concerned to sense your distress at the loss of your toilet, that
I took about fifteen minutes between students this morning to write the
following. Perhaps it will help to assuage your grief.


Requiem for a Toilet

You take from me what I can't use
Decisions made: you can't refuse.
We mourn for you- no grief surcease
our cool companion underneath.
Your porcelain smile was often greeted
by hopes and wishes that you were heated.
But selflessly you stood and served-
We aimed at you, you never swerved.
You're now retired and will not see
a hint of paper or of pee.
We have for you no Shroud of Turin
You have but memories of urine.
So as you rest in your retirement
We ask of you no last requirement
Except that you'll forget, we trust,
The view that you have had of us.

          Tom Dygard, 1/10/00